Hey,
right now I feel like I would like to just leave this body and forget about myself.. (thought I wanted to share some of my feelings, and would love if someone can knock my head off and make me wake up

I feel bad now in my little self because I feel very anxious and scared when relating to people. I don't have a life. I used to laugh before when I heard the term of not having a life.. thought that was impossible.. but right now I feel I'm a very good description ;( .  I feel also it would make things easier for me if I could have the same K. awakening signs as other people, cause that way I would at least have a "reason" why I'm not functioning as I'd like to in society. But NO .. I don't function well socially, but I can't say neither I belong to your group (K.awakened) since the only sign I have is being very emphatic/not grounded... and those are "signs" many, many other people have..  Why can't I just have an earth-shattering awakening that would once and for all prove to my doubtful -self that I'm having an awakening, and test my limits?? at least then I could say.. I don't function well out there, because i'm going through this awakening and soon things will be ok ! using your joke Mystress; I want to be crashed by the Acme -steamroller..

It's like I don't get any of the two and I just end up thinking/feeling/doubting I'm just another one gone wrong both in society and spiritually.. 

..then my smarter self comes in and says .. Smile, relax..everything will be ok.

I would listen to your smart self

I'm dealing with/working through deep issues of social-anxiety myself. Just be patient with yourself and work at it a little at a time. It'll keep persisting until you do start to look at it. But you can do it.

My experience with K hasn't been earth-shattering either. It has not been a very quick process.  It's been a very subtle process in terms of 'feeling-it'.  Apart from the buzzing in my feet or buzzing in the crown the main thing I feel is the repressed pain coming to surface -the fears/anxieties/worries. Sometimes the movement of this is physically painful. I might feel a sharp jab as something releases, but apart from that nothing 'spectacular' . Which is perfect because it pushes me learn to trust myself and the process more - build up faith.

Cheers!

Why do you feel that you don't belong? What in your life is making you unhappy? We can't blame unhappiness on Kundalini or anything else, we need to own the experience. Once you determine what is making you unhappy then let it go. Awakening will not occur until we let go of our attachments and give completely to surrender. Even the bumpy parts of the path such as kriyas and headaches don't usually happen until you have reached a point in surrender where Kundalini can flow freely through you to work out the kinks. That said, not everyone has the same experiences as not everyone carries the same sanskaras. Seeking to have the same experiences as anyone else shows that ego is still at the wheel. Surrender even your expectations of what the Kundalini journey is. Then you'll start to see advancement In Mystress's teachings you could focus on grounding and surrender lessons to help get you there. In other traditions dhyana meditation is also helpful in losing the attachments.

Hey,

Thanks for all answers!! Even though I like to think of myself as someone who is surrendering, I'm actually not so good at it. I'm sad because I feel afraid/very nervous when interacting with people. this leads to me searching to be more alone, or just seeking company with people I feel "easy" to be around with... Normally other people who seem quite, and more calmed. I'm not successful in my job, relationships, no girlfriend, no nothing... yeah .. that's why I'm sad. Surrendering for me is a constant challenge since it's so easy to fall in victim-mode and start thinking that I need to find a "solution".

Blessings to all,
J

Smile, relax..everything will be ok.

  Grounding helps with all kinds of anxiety, as does increasing your calcium intake.

  Some people get social anxiety because they are empathic, the body is resistant to going into situations where it will get invaded by other people's emotions. 

  Have a look at this:
http://kundalini-teacher.com/lessons/project.php

   Blessings!

Thanks Mystress,

Maybe this is all about Relaxing and letting Goddess handle it for us. I felt a deep connection with the text you recommended in the link, and it feels a lot easier to let Goddess help me with everything, instead of wanting to solve and fix people and "problems" ..