Trusting Goddess

[Svarah]

Redoing some of the earlier lessons and lesson 2 talks about healing our Patriarchal associations of a judgemental wraithful God through switching to the term Goddess.



I have gotten a lot out of this practice, however it still doesn't answer my fundamental place of distrust with the Divine- the existence of all the suffering I see around me (much less what I have gone through).



Karma doesn't really cut it for me.... while free will is beautfiful, it baffles my mind why Goddess would allow us to the freedom to... let's say, as is now becoming common place in poor countries, parents selling their children to be prostitutes.... much less the people who would visit them.



The idea that all of this is a dream is maybe the only option I see to reconcile a loving Goddess with all the turmoil.... though barely. It's like if I was a loving parent and my child was having a nighmare I would wake them up ASAP, not over 1,000 lifetimes of torment!



That's my one block to trusting Goddess


much love,


Svarah

[Duu]

Hi,

God as object is trouble. God as having a personality and needs and wants is a disaster.
There is no object, personality that is up there that controls and punishes. Not existing. And its good to reexamine such ideas and surrendering them. Goddess is in you.

All the religions speak about...how cultivating a mind beyond egos self concern and a kind heart will lessen and prevent suffering of us and also of others. Not so hard theology to get.

Yet somehow, it is not so easy to do. It is easier to keep things as they were, feeding unbalanced states of mind and not caring for wisdom much. Then blaming devil or god.
Escaping responsibility by thinking that Goddess or devil is outside of us somewhere far away..
And we are not responsible in slightest. We are shocked to see who we really are. Reflected in our actions.

If you dont make the choice to cultivate wisdom and kindness. You will unavoidably create suffering for yourself and others. The basic of traditional law of karma is this. And of course karma is in you it is not out there. And if we live together with others, lack of wisdom of others will impact us and the planet. Unity of all things. So if what suffering we see is insufficient for us to select that choice daily, then only a good, paradise like world has a zero chance.
Can you trust yourself that you have the ability already inside you to be more kinder and wiser right now? Can you trust that we all are capable of the same? So suffering is optional. Its based on choices of all of us. And every one of us counts.


love,
Duu

[Svarah]

Thanks for your response Duu.



While I find much wisdom in your post, I'm not really seeing an answer to the question/issue I posed.....



peace!


Svarah

[Duu]

Hi,
Well it is a big question so I tried to offer a more open answer.
I can summarize again.
You say you distrust Goddess because she allows bad stuff to happen. Right?
In that you assume that such a being called “Goddess” is up there, that she controls all and can allow or disallow certain behavior. In my opinion such “Goddess” does not really exist. Then a question if to trust or not to trust becomes layered with rich meanings. Yes we can trust in not realy existing ideas and have benefits for sure.. People do that and it is lovely in a romantic and practical sort of way. But overflowing with many hidden dangers.



If someone want to see “Goddess” as an all controlling like a “father God”. Whom we must please, and who is rewarding good and punishing bad. Thats just a substitute parent, a father god ideal renamed. Easy to understand even for simple folks as it is genetically supported. It soothes us, strengthens us and helps community.
But that mystical path can go deeper. Nondual Goddess is something different from above described. In a way that is much more potent and much harder to grasp. And because it somehow challenges theistic model it is not often heard. Any theistic model even monotheistic model is duality based. But non-duality mystical path cant really work with theistic model well. Or only up to some point. And then some answers are no longer possible within theistic model. So it can happen that language of theistic model might be kept but the meanings shift.
So in short I felt in your post a remainder of a theistic mode of view that seems to be the obstacle and was left in dark, not investigated.

Faith, trust as an expression of being comfortable with not investigating or thinking ourselves is really a theistic path for simple people. If you wish to inquire into reality of divine and life then inquire. But then don't bring in trust as issue as there what you find out, ascertain is base of natural trust and no trust need to be added. In short for me lack of trust equals here to lack of investigation.
That is good. Generally adding or cultivating trust which is not based on experience is dangerous and also nonsense. And so a better question is more about what directions of explorations and investigations are recommended.
In previous post some paths are recommended, so you can re-evalutae and see what beliefs and notions you discover within related to your question. No external answer on this type of question as you stated will truly help you.
Also I just ranted a bit about idea that spirituality has capacity to be completely meaningful and helping people hugely even without god. As maybe to expand ideas in view. Would you find spiritual path without god of any kind still meaningful? Who would you then blame for your pain or pain of others? How would that change you feelings in you toward your issues?

Love
Duu

[Mystress]

   Something consistent I noted about my work, long ago... people are drawn to me, by their own prayers. Sometimes they didn't even know they were praying (every thought is a prayer) and sometimes they sought a solution and the road to it was nothing they had imagined but there is this consistency. Sometimes the prayer might be middle-age ennui "is that all there is to life?" or worry about a loved one. Sometimes the synchronicities following the prayer that led them to my work is impossible/miraculous.

  Being an answer to peoples prayers is a strange job, to say the least. One would think it a big honour but its actually tremendously humbling especially the strange reflection thing shamans do, we end up setting ourselves aside to become what others need us to be for them, for the resolution.

  I do know this: Goddess has it handled, and sometimes She handles it, through us.

   I was reading a biography/interview with Mr. Rogers, the long time host of the American childrens' show, "Mr. Rogers neighborhood. His mom knitted all those cardigans! She taught him, when you see news of disaster on TV, look for the helpers... they are always there, the people helping.  It is true, response to disaster often brings out the best in people, it provides an opportunity to practice compassion.

  Every thought is a prayer. We are Gods of our own lives, our thoughts shape our personal reality, and Goddess gave us that power, Free Will is Her law, and She does not judge. You want to blame Her for what people choose to do with their Godlike power of free will? Go ahead, She does not mind. 

  As I have written elsewhere- what we can draw from studies of near death experiences, the essential purpose of life is practicing how to love better. Necessity is the motherf*cker of invention, and everywhere we are challenged, are the helpers, practicing new ways to love better.

  Bill Gates has taken on a personal crusade to eliminate polio from the planet, dedicated some billions to inoculating every person on the planet so polio becomes extinct. Good people do stuff like that.

  Often challenges bring out the best in an individual too, the Terry Fox story is of big big love, kid loses a leg to cancer and all he wants is to help fund a cure for the sake of others. His quest killed him when the cancer came back but he turned into a global icon of hope. I think these things are soul choices.

  If, as a soul, you were offered opportunity to practice learning to love better, in the form of a short life with a lot of pain that would inspire millions to greater compassion, would you say yes? Did Jesus say yes?

   On the news the other day, a laughing guru is in town offering laughing workshops. His wife teaches with him, she nearly died of cancer and now every day is precious and filled with joy and laughter. Death, is what makes life precious.  Viktor Frankyl, became enlightened in Auchswitz concentration camp, and went on to write "Man's search for meaning," translated into a hundred languages, he is often considered the godfather of the modern new age movement.

  In the movie, the Matrix, Neo asks, why is the matrix so awful? The matrix answered that in early experiments, they made it a paradise... and the people did not thrive. We need something to push against, to make us strong just as a tree needs the wind.

  Siddharta, protected childhood not allowed to see aging, poverty, illness, pain or death... when he finally did it was a terrible shock, awakening big compassion that changed his life and led to his becoming the Buddha. That's what that stuff, is for!

   The way to dig yourself out of grief at personal misfortune is to step out of yourself and examine the bigger picture.

  My childhood- massively dysfunctional but it made me look for Goddess love within myself.  A serious back injury on New Years eve 1997 took out a whole swathe of other activities and left me with chronic pain and not much to do but internet, would I have written FST without the injury? I do not know. 

  My biggest supporter at the time it was written, (besides my druid) was my beloved percyval, was severely ill with late stage lyme disease and possibly the closest thing to a living saint I have ever known. Extremely kind and generous man who never had a bad word to say about anyone.

  In Goddess eyes we are immortal, part of Her own infinite essence, we can never really be harmed or die in the play of maya.  Ego can judge good and bad all day long but She does not, like that. So to say, "She allows bad things to happen" is to misunderstand the nature of the Divine and absent yourself from personal responsibility. Not much different than blaming the devil except blaming Goddess is giving Her the karma, an ass backward yet effective form of surrender. 
 
  What you see, is yourself reflected.  Goddess Gaia sees us all like fingers of Her own hands, She is intimate with Her creations when we choose to commune with Her but on another level we are all pawns to evolution. I feel it keenly at times, the demands of shamanic imperative.  Goddess loves you unconditionally and will not grieve when you die, because to Her you never will.

  We hold onto the elephants tail, we do not get to see all the ripples of every action, every choice... but if you want to find Divine purpose in the stuff your ego judges as bad, you need to let go of the judgments and look for perfection in it. Everywhere you look, you will find people whose personal misfortune inspired them to try to make a kinder world, doing what they can to help others.

  I have been dealing with a stress disorder lately, fallout from pushing my resources too hard... We all want to avoid stress, right? is bad for you? Came across a TED video ... turned my head around, another example of the power of gratitude.
   Kelly McGonigal: How to make stress your friend
   http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RcGyVTAoXEU

   Stress only harms you, if you believe it does? WTF?? I made myself sick by worrying that stress I was taking on from others, would make me sick? oy. That pill is a hard one to swallow, but also, inspiration. 

  Of the Nazi Holocaust, was born Viktor Frankyl, Anne Frank, the united nations, the global human rights movement...  On an individual and collective level, atrocities and terrible tragedy and loss.... but on an evolutionary scale, the global response to it was a massive change of consciousness toward greater compassion towards our fellow human beings. The history of the Hebrews is full of genocide and slaughter, the old testament is full of stories of whole cities slaughtered in Jewish victories and some say the karma came around. Harsh perspective. On a soul level, did 9 million people agree to resolve some ancestral karma and make the world a more peaceful place via their personal sacrifice? Ask your discernment.

  Out of WW2 came the internet, and the cold war... the entire planet having a near death experience, facing potential for Armageddon, finally, mostly choosing disarmament. Out of the internet, the communications revolution and the beginnings of a global identity. We have seen the aftermath of Hiroshima, we have seen the photo of the little girl running away, burning with napalm and we will not do that to our fellow human beings and their descendants again. 

  I told someone recently, we take direction not just from what we run towards, but what we are running away from. Both are important. The planet is still, running from the trauma of the holocaust, into better ideals of peace.

  The Dalai lama says that the Chinese invasion sparked the Tibetan diaspora, pushed out of their tiny country walled by mountains, Tibetans and their mysticism of peace flowed out all over the world... possibly, including, some lamas being born in new places... showing up teaching on the internet... 

  In prison you may find many avoiding taking responsibility for their choices, they say, "What I did is not my fault, I had a bad childhood" and on the streets, the hospices and among the helpers of every disaster you will find the people who had an even worse childhood and it made them resolve to rise above it, and be better than the ones who harmed them. It comes down to the choice of the individual, and what they got inside.

   The essence of free will, is the choice to trust love or fear.  Your ego can easily point to reasons to trust fear, that's what it does, invent excuses for being afraid. It can do that all day long but the nature of faith is a blind leap, trusting to love. No use being hard on Duu, nothing anybody can say to you will make you choose love instead of fear.  That comes down to what you got, inside. Have you got the right stuff? Faith takes courage.