Artmaking / Dealing with Rejection

[M.J.]

I am an artist and have spent they last 4 months preparing for a solo gallery show.  I created 15 oil paintings, all inspired by what I've been studying and experiencing as I move through this course. 

I dropped off the work several days ago, and received an email today from the gallery saying it wasn't a good fit for their gallery, it wasn't what they expected based on what they'd seen from me, and they were NOT going to hang it. 

This shocked and devastated me, as I feel that I put my heart and soul into creating these paintings.  Throughout the creation process, I prayed daily to turn over control of the work to my DB and Goddess.  I also prayed that I let go of egoic attachment to the paintings and to the end result. 

So now I recognize that my "broken heart" response over what feels like a monumental rejection, is that egoic attachment and needs surrendered.  It hurts though, and I do not understand why they won't hang them.

I haven't yet gotten an explanation from the gallery as to why my work was not a good "fit" for them.  I feel that it is the strongest work of mine to date, and I give all credit to Goddess for that. But I (or my ego) can't help but wonder now - is the work "bad"?  Should I stop making art, if this is how it is received - a door slammed in the face? 

Thank you all for reading, and please feel free to respond with your thoughts.  I would appreciate any feedback.  I am adding a few images of the paintings that were rejected.

Goddess, Please take my pain and self-doubt, my feeling of rejection, my anger, my embarrassment, confusion, all the karmic baggage from this experience, and all that is attached to it.  It is a gift for you, it is yours.  Please adjust my prayers to serve your will.  Thank you very much. 

[M.J.]

I happened to get to the "What are Attachments" lesson today, and man! So relevant to what I'm going through and what I shared in this post.  Thank you Goddess!!!  I got what I prayed for.

[Ernst]

Dear M.J.,
your paintings are beautiful - I can imagine it's wonderful being an artist and creating.

blessings
e.

[astoe]

Art!

And the way we feel it is "us" on levels that we cannot communicate by other means. It can be so painful and fulfilling at the same time.

I know what you mean and I can feel through you Mail how deep this affects you. I am not a painter but coming from the music production side.

Let me simply say this: Let go, let totally go. What one Gallery says does not matter. Everything is perfect and obviously Goddess doesn't want you to have your paintings exposed there for any reason.
In any case, the fact that the Gallery does not want your work doesn't say anything about its quality.

But then, maybe Goddess' intent is to make a much bigger present to you: Teaching you that the art itself is independent from the artist's longing for recognition.

Today - after many blows - I see that for long time I was defining my way through music. I thought that being an artist and producing music had some inherent value. Well, it has not.  At least not anymore on the level we want to work. It is the same illusion than thinking people will like us because we drive a Porsche.

BTW: When Van Gogh died he barely had something to put in his mouth and had no recognition. Took some more time than expected! ( I am sure you know that so it is rather a gentle reminder).

... Maybe if you dedicate all the art to the great mother she will keep it for herself?  LOL

[M.J.]

Thank you, Ernst!

And thank you, Astoe.  Your eloquent reply put into words what I was already beginning to see, and helped a lot. 

But then, maybe Goddess' intent is to make a much bigger present to you: Teaching you that the art itself is independent from the artist's longing for recognition.

I think this is right on, but letting go is a struggle so far - I'm still shook up.  My ego is still clinging. 

Amazing, I think, how I'd been praying to release egoic attachments to my art.  Exactly what I asked for, yet I never saw it coming.  Also amazing to me that I came to the "What are Attachments" lesson in the midst of it.  This course... it works so perfectly. 

[astoe]

You are most welcome M.J.,

You know, maybe in one year you'll say: "Oh my god(dess)! How lucky I was that they didn't take my paintings! I would have missed out............... <- space to be filled by you/life.

a

[Mystress]

   Rejection is navigation, keeps us moving till we find the place where we belong. I would like to buy "Seeker", it is radiant. My eyes will not tire of tracing the lines of the seeker to the lines of the trees, to the softness where sky fades to red and back again.

 I would love to make an online/sl gallery for your work.
 
 I agree with the gallery, your paintings do not belong there. They are not paintings, they are magic spells, highly charged portals and such creations that belong to Goddess, must be treated as sacred. Goddess owns them and She knows whom each one is for, and which are yours.  
 

[Sigmund]

Where did you post the link to your paintings?  I'd like to look at them and can't seem to find how to.  Thanks. 

[Mystress]

 Two paintings were attached to her first post in this thread. Click on the thumbnails.

[M.J.]

Mystress - Thank you for your incredible feedback.  I honestly didn't know they were so charged.  I guess all that spiritual energy did pay off.  All credit belongs to Goddess, of course.

I would love to sell you "Seeker".  Perhaps we can work out the details via email - mine is mgntn42@gmail.com

And I would absolutely love to have you set up an online gallery.  I do have a website, but I have been wondering how I would get these works in front of the appropriate audience.   I will be tremendously grateful for your help with that. 

[astoe]

)))))

Hurray!

[WillyT]

Wow beautiful MJ

[M.J.]

Thank you, WillyT 

And Astoe - I'm touched by your delight in this thread.

[astoe]

... and I was talking about a year. 

It makes me happy that transformation also happens on the artistic level.

a

[Mari]

I still do not get how to see the art attached to M.J's first post...

[Mystress]

Just click on the thumbnail images at the bottom.