How to meet my DB

[Minamaus]

Dear All,

Just felt like writing this down:

I have not yet formally been introduced to my DB, although I have just passed the lesson on 'surrendering'. I am not very visual but extremely sensitive (to lots of things, noise, negative energy, coffee, alcohol, bread, milk, you name it) and mostly 'feel''things. I remember when I was a young teenager that I often imagined I was a boy, but was happy being a girl, too. I cannot see my DB nor hear it but 'feel' there is something I love, but as soon as I try to distinguish between the 'me' and the ''other'', it feels like we switch, or I am not sure which one I am,  a bit like when my eyes get tired and I cannot see three-dimentional anymore. I feel fantastic but also am a bit confused, any ideas ? I feel very looked after, am in no way fearful, I love the whole process but I seem to dissolve a little bit a the moment, as if bits of me starting to fall off, and then I am at loss to understand what is it that is left ? As if I am the ''other' for a few moments before I am myself again...


Sorry for garbling on.....hope to see you at next FST session, I have not yet introduced myself, but had difficulties dressing so did not want to join you all with half my panties hanging out.....Love, Minamaus

[Mystress]

??  You meet the DB after the lesson on it.

[Minamaus]

Mystress,

I have done the DB lesson now a couple of times and I noticed that I cannot get a clear image, nothing is coming up, but a feeling of not being loveable, hence I cannot imagine a DB (or anything) that would love me, what shall I do ? I feel I need to let go of something but don't know what it is....

Regards,

Minamaus

[Mystress]

  Surrender the feelings of not being loveable, and have patience.

  The DB is to teach you more of surrender so its inconsistent for it to show up when your ego wants. Often it doesn't give a clear form so you dont get attached to form, which is limiting.  You can *invite* it to be with you but not demand or coerce it.  

[Minamaus]

Thanks Mystress........Minamaus