Shedding skin

[Sean]

Hello,

Got a name for what's been going on. Listening to Pantera.

I
Am shedding skin
Changing within

...etc..

Cool. Have to get used to the new skin, or at least try to until it all changes again. Been working on my past things with my nice councilor, Its pretty strange. I'm learning a lot. But it still hurts, I look inside and see a big sore now instead of the blackness. I think its healing now. I wish I could just wave a wand and make it all go away, everything. But this works different. Its so deep.. I am learning a lot about everything.

Just today I learned about getting stuck with other peoples problems. She showed me what it is to be stuck changing things in other people and moving beyond that. She pointed to the problem and said, "You can move beyond this you know, if you still work with this, you will be stuck at this level, and with these problems. Do you want these problems? She pointed at the blue sky and continued, or do you want this?"

"I want this!", I said as I jumped into the clear blue sky with a new level of understanding. Cool. I let it all go and flew around for a bit.

Of course its different. Understanding comes without sentences and words. More like feelings or images. Its cool.

ALso I have all these girls that I imagine about. I remember a time ago when I used to wake up and see a new beatifull girl every morning. So amazing. Never said anything. Just there. All inside. Now I see them again sometimes, more now. I talk to them, I used to wonder about them until when I was complaining about somthing by my heart she casualy reached in took something out and tossed it over her shoulder and continued the conversation. LOL. Now I know.... One of them told me to follow her and went up a winding stone tower, I was about to go back but we made it to the top and she said to go ahead and up at the top was this bright and shiny person who said,

"Soon, you will leave this place."

Whoa,Cool, thanks buddy. Just what I needed to hear. Strange hehe. I got nervous so I havn't gone there again yet. Half the time I think I am imagining all this stuff, I have a great imagination. But then stuff happens that I never planned at all hehe.

Ok later..

Sean