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Goddess said "Tell them."

Started by Mystress, Apr 06, 2013, 09:13:24 PM

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Mystress

  I don't like to complain and I really hate to nag people. I surrendered this issue, prayed for guidance and Goddess said, "tell them."  Arrgh. I don't want to!   
   ok.

   If more students paid their renewal fees FST would be doing very well. Just because I don't delete expired memberships does not mean I do not need them to be paid.

  My paypal account balance is $0., my checking account is overdrawn and I dunno about visa but it looks like my tier payments to secondlife have been coming off it via paypal. My car insurance is due on the 11th.. guess it will stay parked in the driveway. My trip to Europe is cauncelled.

  In dec I went to buy my husband a gift, not a big thing, he had asked for a ukulele.  I didn't have enough cash and discovered my visa was declined and my bank overdraft was maxed. I had to phone druid and ask him to put his xmas gift on his visa. I still had some money in paypal and was able to bail it out, but partly because a long time supporter and k list member who is not even an FST student, made a $500 donation.

   Its a position of faith that if I am generous with people, people will be generous with me.  Cosmic return. That's my business model lol.  The number of students who get that, is quite a small percentage.

   It is tradition, the priestess/shaman takes care of the community and the community takes care of them. I sometimes wonder if the community even realizes how much they are supported by my energy and spiritual presence.

  Some might say, 'hidden bargain" but I am really quite up front about it. On the front page of k teacher it says:

I earn my daily bread through those who have the resources and motive to hire me for individual sessions, initiations, workshops, or take my online courses... and a cherished few, who freely choose to make love donations in support of my work, whether they benefit from it directly, or not.

   Something similar on the renewals page. There is a dependence on the ones who see that they got more than they paid for, to cover the costs of those who take it for granted.  Is that fair, really? The more enlightened are generous to sponsor the others to get a free ride?  I stop to wonder about the wisdom of continuing to support people who continue to show they do not value it.

  Cross off individual sessions & initiations.. I retired from public session work, so FST students are my whole client base and months go by with no sessions booked at all. I can understand why students feel they don't need it.. the tearoom and the chats support them enough.

  What is the value of the chats? I sometimes teach stuff there that exists no where else on the planet. One student sends me $30 after every chat.  I did not ask for that but sure appreciate it.

  The next chat I plan to test a new way to see Goddess within yourself that I have successfully tested with 7 people, 6 men and one woman. The focus has been on men because I have observed a tendency in men to try too hard to invoke the DB and instead end up with what witches would call a patron, some archtypal old Goddess answering the call may be cool but it is not the DB. The Beloved is unique to the individual. The old ones are much more cooperative and sometimes have their own agenda.  For so many years I have wished for a way to let others see Goddess as I see Her in them but its always been impossible... until now!  The process is quite personal and not something can be coded into a lesson... after the chat you can all tell me, what something so priceless and impossible, is worth. 

  All this new magic and healing that has come to FST in the past few years has been the result of my research in secondlife, even the attainment of the womb fire. Some students may not know about the womb fire...

  A little over two years ago an energy center that used to be the size of a ping pong ball and blazing white in the 90s, (the source of my initial ascension) transformed, it grew to a crystal the size of a soccer ball blazing orange fire, parked at my womb. Took me 6 months wondering what it was before I recognized the impossible, it is a small energy model of the fiery crystal heart of the planet and I have become a vessel of that in a previously unimaginable way... and I remember a dream from grade 3...  I learned about the layers of the planet and that I could never go home by digging, and I did not want to live. I think that is what inspired it. I travelled into the mind of my future, adult, self realized self. I had a bunch of these dreams but this was the only one with two way communication. Asked her about the light at the center of the planet she said "I have become that" indicating her belly. Child self didn't believe t for a second lol!  Even so... I have become that. The womb fire has been showing and teaching me astonishing things about human consciousness, our evolution and DNA. Even how to change some types of DNA in living adults, specific types that are set after conception,

  A friend has taken to calling me "Avatar of Gaia" and ... I guess the shoe fits? I look back down the road I have travelled.. around 1995 I used to use a line from hitchhikers guide to the galaxy. Marvin the paranoid android would say "here I am, brain the size of a planet..." complaining when asked to do something menial. I would say it when I felt I had done something stupid until one day my inner voice responded. "Yes, this one."  Stopped me dead in my tracks with my mouth hanging open astonished. The small voice told me this planet is my brain. Slide farther back, age 2 went into the light, knew it was under the ground and this amazing love brilliant light said 'you are my child."  She claimed me and I have been Hers always.

  Kundalini is all about evolving and mine has taken me to a place of learning how to change evolution in a way I never imagined was even possible. 

  That path of research was sparked in 2005 because my work was taking me down. Edema is the first sign of karma toxicity in an empathic healer and it was becoming chronic. I was starting to get paranoid about FST becoming too successful because it seemed every student got a piece of me. Goddess kept bringing more and so I prayed for strength, got a new guide and worked very hard, in secret for years.

  What has come out of the sl research, the womb fire and taking a load of time to mentor two shamans:
    A short list:
    Edema is gone.
   in 1997 I posted an article about the new discovery of the female social consciousness gene that is switched off in the male fetus, that article is reproduced in the genes and gender lesson. I got a strong intuition that Kundalini can turn the gene back on, and that is what makes somebody like Gandhi.  These past years I have been honoured to witness it happening in two of the lineage. I do not have a lab to test their DNA and prove it but the changes in their consciousness now that the gene is active and the male ego is transparent, is wow!  The path of surrender is so hard for men because male ego is the band aid for the silent gene.  I don't understand it will enough to nail it down to a road or ritual, only that they key is deep deep, submission to the Divine Feminine.

   A new resolution for post traumatic stress that is DIY and miraculous. Given that so much of my work is plagiarized all over the web, this one is going into a book to nail down my copyrights.

   A shamanic resolution for narcissistic personality disorder that is showing high success rates. Narcissism is supposedly incurable but I was shown where it lives and how to take it out... and it is the root of all sociopathic behavior.

   Sociopathic behaviors in turn are related to what we call, becoming warehoused... the original identity disappears into the unconscious like the last image of the movie, Indiana Jones and the lost ark. The crate disappearing into the basement of the Smithsonian.  Shamans can find the crate, open it up, talk to the sleeper.... sometimes persuade them to come out.

  What has me most excited right now involves remapping some DNA that is formed in childhood. OMG and Holy Shit! I had no idea that was even possible but I have done it, with myself and two others. Check your own discernment.

  It is a relatively recent discovery, some genes that govern the brains response to stress are formed in childhood. If the childhood is traumatic,, or even insufficiently nurturing more stress genes get switched on and you get an anxiety ridden adult who struggles to stay grounded. The science that discovered the genetic changes has not a clue how to switch them back... I am learning how. 

  I enjoy watching "big bang theory" because I always had a soft spot for geeks and its so funny, laughter heals and cleanses.  They scientists are always talking about what discovery will get them a Nobel Prize...  watching I had the same funny thought about myself, but surrendered it laughing because I an incapable of believing myself to be so important. Soon after got a massive mod from Goddess, had to lay down because it felt like my skull was being reshaped with ripples all through my body while some sort of light show went off in the right side of my brain.  Hurt like hell! I kept saying "it will be as Goddess Wills."  So I guess the womb fire did not agree with me about my insignificance.

A strange touchstone for this work, a clue from my guide came from the movie Blade Runner...  The  one replicant who was sane and not homicidal, had been gifted with a past .... someone else's memories of growing up.  The past only exists in memory and memories are fluid. My work has touched on it before... does in many places. Never too late to have a happy childhood... releasing the karma of past events changes your memory of them to one of greater understanding. To remap someone's whole life.. I did not dare to try. So of course Goddess boxed me into it and brought me two people who had no other option.

   Granted, my sl presence is my biggest expense but two hours of session time per month would cover it, and the research I am doing there is priceless. A few months last year I actually made more money doing custom work in secondlife at about minimum wage than I did from sessions, which isn't hard because sessions were zero. I would sell my car before I would give up my work in secondlife, and my car is a 1991 240sx. What do you think a 22 year old car is worth? I am not living an extravagant lifestyle, I do not have 97 rolls royces or a private island near fiji like Osho or Adi Da.. I live a very modest hermit lifestyle and rarely even leave the house.

   A student who booked a session recently said he thought I do not like to do sessions. Dunno where that idea came from. I know the photo on the sessions page may look a bit formidable but..  I depend on sessions, I enjoy working with students 1 on 1 especially if they are far enough along to get the basics so we can dig through the bigger stuff. They get better value.  I kind of wore out with doing Tummo initiations because they are about half scripted and half improv, and ADD brains started to get impossibly restless with the repetition and did not want initiates to be dealing with my genetic impatience.   

  Cross off workshops, I only do them once every few years and usually make enough to cover travel expenses.

  In fact for the past many years FST is kept afloat by dead people... two small inheritances that probably should have gone into an RRSP or something... I don't have anything like that... no stocks or bonds or investments but this. My whole retirement plan is my husband's ongoing support.

   My leap of faith is starting to crash and burn. Well.. starting isn't the right word. Its hit the dirt and blazing some time ago because I am too generous.

  I do not believe in astrology because my discernment says its bullshit... but anything can carry a grain of truth and I once read that saggitarians are unusually generous people but the one way to piss them off forever is to take unfair advantage of their generosity.  Rang true. That be where I am at.  More depressed than pissed though.

  and then I get an email like this:


  My friend highly recommended your course and I would love to join but due to chronic pain I've been unemployed for over a year.  I noticed that you offer scholarships sometimes and I'm wondering if that is an option.  If not, can I use my friend's account to view the videos until I earn enough to join?
Thank you for your inspiring work!


  I am going to assume the video sharing is their own idea and that offer was not made by one of my students. I prefer to think, if someone was so invested in their friend taking FST they would loan or gift them with a membership rather than steal from me. 

   I got chronic pain too, and ADHD, a touch of oppositional defiance, a balance disorder and deaf in one ear... I have been unemployable since my Shaman grad in 97 and even before that ADD made regular jobs a struggle.  I am not asking anyone for charity because of it, I get no disability payments or grants. This is my job and my accountant says I am a humanitarian. I told him my business model of cosmic return and he laughed and said, Humanitarian. He said what defines a business is a goal of profit... felt like a little pat on the head. druid agreed, said 'everybody but you knows you are a humanitarian. People in business don't make the decisions you do.'

  Job.. obviously not.. calling, yes. In fact there is almost nothing in my life that is not in some way related to my spiritual work. Even my art, is a necessity to release karma people give me that they do not actually want to let go of.

  I am self conscious about complaining because there are a lot of people worse off... in the US especially, home foreclosures etc are leaving people destitute.  The biggest sponsor of *me*, my primary patron is my husband and he works hard all day doing the engineer gig to pay our mortgage and groceries and heat... he doesn't pay my other expenses of FST and SL and the many various expenses of my calling, and I do not ask him to. 

  Lately it feels like this is my job;
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_MaJDK3VNE
I said that to someone this morning and he said 'you are and always will be a cat herder'  Not sure if it is prophecy or curse...

  A few years back, a pagan acquaintance I gave some healing to at an event went oooo and decided to help me... She was a guru chaser before she became a witch and started telling me how I need a good portrait to start selling guru cards for altars and ... yadda yadda.. Wow not clear on the concept... No, no and no.

   Others tell me, FST should be a monthly subscription service... wtf? No.

  The business model should work, if the ones who benefit support the school then its all good... and a few do. Very small percentage. I would bet 90% of the students who do not renew, make more money than I do, work far fewer hours and at least 30% spend their disposable income on stuff that does not give them nearly so much benefit. 

  I bet most do not even know the measure of the benefit.

  Some do.

  Another devoted student from a poor country asked to tithe to me for a year. My first response was to ask, did I accidentally brainwash him? I have a general policy of not refusing money freely offered, but I talked to him about it before I would accept. 

  Tithing means to give some amount of your income, usually 10%, to your church or whatever spiritual group or affiliation you put faith in.  Most catholic churches expect it, so do a lot of Masonic type men's groups like the shriners and the lions and the elks and all the other wildlife because it supports the facility and is an incredibly powerful form of abundance magic!!

  Everybody wins. What is given to Goddess comes back multiplied, you will find tithing mentioned in every book about money and spirituality, from Napoleon Hill's "think and grow rich" from the 40s, to "rich dad poor dad" as well as numerous spiritual sources.  The student chose to continue tithing when the year was up and I have watched those gifts slowly double in amount as he became more abundant...they are still usually less than $200  but more importantly, the amount of time he spends doing the stuff to earn money has decreased massively, giving him the priceless leisure to focus on his spiritual goals and consider new sources of income.   

  It was his own idea.. really not my style to ask. I am not a church. The reason I am a school and not a church is because FST is non denominational.  Becoming a church would close the door to many of my students whose primary  religion would not allow them to join a second church.

   Last summer, a very manipulative student was demanding how to support me better, wanting more attention..  trying every manipulative trick he knew.. it was after a session and I was still wide open spiritually emphatically so even though I could not be influenced I could be affected and it was unpleasant. He had no skills I could use and with that kind of manipulative attitude it is a setup anyway...  finally feeling pressured I mentioned one student is tithing and he thew the suggestion back in my face as evidence of my greed a few months later.

  "The Japanese have 13 ways to say thank you, and every one translates as resentment of debt."   

  I paused to wonder, if there is benefit in paying what about not?

  Asked the shamans to ask their guides about it.

[12:06:23 PM]  Mystress: have spent part of two days writing a post nagging students to pay renewal fees
[12:06:36 PM]  Mystress: feeling taken for granted
[12:07:23 PM]  Mari: yes it sucks
[12:08:59 PM]  Mystress: I got a bad scare last night checking email, a notice from march that my SL tier payment had not gone through, visa declined.. I had made a payment so it went through the next time they tried but I freaked cold a minute.
[12:10:01 PM]  Mari: what about making renewal not optional?
[12:10:25 PM]  Mystress: what does your gut say about it?
[12:12:18 PM]  Mari: hmmm its not a  clear yes
[12:12:34 PM]  Mari: students should have some decency themselves
[12:12:51 PM]  Mari: you know, i couldn't do much else than renew back in the day
[12:12:59 PM]  Mari: voice in my head made it very clear
[12:13:13 PM]  Mari: got shaktiblast the minute i had made the payment
[12:13:51 PM]  Mari: i actually thought theres like guardian system in fst
[12:14:20 PM]  Mari: i was made very clear about not talking about posts to outsiders and renewal
[12:14:47 PM]  Mari: only later realized it wasn't like that to everybody
[12:14:55 PM]  Mari: or then they don't listen
[12:15:02 PM]  Mystress: they just don't think
[12:15:05 PM]  Mari: money asked is very small
[12:16:41 PM]  Mystress: There is no guardian system, I create no penalties. I am trying to make my post not be a rant, but
[12:18:16 PM]  Mari: my ex school... she actually asked tithing form older students
[12:18:28 PM]  Mystress: I mention tithing
[12:18:43 PM]  Mari: it was free will based, but most realized the importance of the teaching
[12:18:57 PM]  Mari: you get back multiplied...
[12:18:58 PM]  Mystress: and my Kundalini teaching is the best in the world
[12:19:21 PM]  Mystress: yes
[12:19:29 PM]  Mari: her students realized the importance of tithing for themselves
[12:21:45 PM]  Mari: it could be one lesson :) how to create abundance
[12:21:54 PM]  Mari: giving and receiving
[12:22:37 PM]  Mari: money is hell of an important lesson....
[12:23:21 PM]  Mystress: well Goddess said "tell them"
------------------
[12:04:04 PM] Mystress: want some depression snacks? I got them
[12:09:03 PM] dreamwalker: Sure
[12:09:46 PM] Mystress: thank you
[12:10:33 PM] dreamwalker: :)
[12:13:03 PM] Mystress: so grateful for you
[12:14:46 PM] Mystress: ask (his guide)  what is the effect on students who continue to use FST but don't renew or pay me?
[12:15:39 PM] dreamwalker: Ok
[12:21:21 PM] dreamwalker: They will get stuck
[12:21:52 PM] Mystress: really?? wow
[12:22:23 PM] dreamwalker: Well like they are at a threshold but cannot get past it
[12:25:14 PM] Mystress: that is not my doing?
[12:25:35 PM] Mystress: I wouldn't penalize someone like that... Goddess does it?
[12:26:35 PM] dreamwalker: Well it  looks like they do it themselves
[12:26:41 PM] dreamwalker: Thoughts
[12:26:55 PM] Mystress: giving energy to scarcity?
[12:27:00 PM] dreamwalker: Yes

   Well I get why Goddess insisted I tell...


  I recognize FST has some issues.  I have avoided promoting it more widely because of the issues, notably the videos but those updates have been "in process" with many problems since the mid 90s.  This week G finally uploaded for me a batch of the fresh edits from the master, 40 files out of 56.  He hasn't found the grounding yet.  I have the new videos  on my hard drive and am uploading them to the vimeo pro video hosting account I got in jan...  and the conversion keeps stalling out. 

   I don't believe in struggle. I believe my business model is right, despite abundant evidence presented by my financial records. I don't want to become one of those churchs or gurus that's always nagging for donations, guilt tripping people into taking out a second mortgage to pay the cult.

  I am not asking for anything like that.  I am not even asking anything for free, although donations are appreciated. I am just asking students to be fair with me, for the people who are benefiting from the school and community to pay the modest yearly fee I ask for, or book a session with me. Do what's right, the labourer is worthy of her hire.

 
   


Ernst

Dear Mystress,
Thank you so much for this post. I am getting so much from Fire Serpent Tantra and I am truly grateful for its existence. You made it real and from my perspective it is the greatest mystery school on earth.

I am also grateful that you are always a teacher and not a guru for me. Despite the fact that if you would decide to be a guru you could be easily  the most powerful with a lot of fellows. Therefore I really appreciate your approach to learn how to empower myself and not you  ;).  I surrendered Goddess the desire to support FST and play lottery ;).

I have tried to promote Fire Serpent Tantra and tell people about but they cannot see/feel it. Goddess has it handled.

I am looking forward to have a session with you.

Thank you so much for your continuous service to Goddess.

PS: The Cat herding video made me laugh to tears.

Svarah

Thank you for your very frank, honest yet nonjudgmental post Mystress.

I'm feeling in integrity around renewing, and I would love to offer a donation. The paypal link on K-teacher isn't working, is there another way to send you some money-love? Or what email should I paypal it to?


xo,

S,e.e.



Mystress


  In all the tearoom archives there is not another post complaining about students not renewing.  Sure I did not want to tell... ascended master cannot summon a few $$? Bloody pathetic... but for years I have doing so, been persisting with a leap of faith over and over,  happy when the money comes from somewhere to keep going, but now it has stopped working because its not right. Is not the first time Goddess used economic blackmail to push me to do what I do not want.

   In my spiritual work elsewhere I do warn people of the necessity of high integrity in sacred space because the karma feedback of a lie or or giving energy to negative thoughts or fear is multiplied... it did not occur to me before that my generosity with FST could be having a negative effect on my students, aside from previously recognising that scholarships are a bad idea.

     On the other side the high vibe gives wings to the positive spiritual. 

  In a few places in the note I invite readers to check their discernment about stuff, curious to hear the results.
   


donations@fire-serpent.org

Mystress

  druid told me a dream he had last night. In the dream he was visiting a university and one prof said pay attention at 8 pm tonight, being mysterious. In the dream it was a nice night so he was sleeping outside, and he saw some shooting stars... but they looked strange, they were breaking into pieces in the sky like fireworks and he'd never seen that before. I said I think they usually break up like that hitting the upper atmosphere and are already shattered as much as they can be when we see them.  druid agreed... and continued.

  There was another shooting star and he could see this one was headed right for him... but as he couldn't quite tell where it would land it made no sense to try to run so he just stood and watched it come. ( Yeah, that's My druid, :) )  It hit the earth behind him, gouging out a blazing deep rut and setting the whole forest and everything on fire before mysteriously flying off into space again.

  This part of the dream bugged him, because hes an engineer and "asteroids just do not do that, is not how gravity works... asteroid does not have enough momentum to get back into orbit." The dream concluded with his going back to the university to tell the prof about it, but I was already laughing...

    "omg that is me!  The meteor!! Crashing back to earth..."

   "... and setting everything on fire..." he said.

   "Yes!!" 

  ...  both of us laughing.  What else to do but stand and watch it come?

     Good to know I will make it back into orbit.

     Buckle your seatbelts...   

Ernst

Thank you so much Mystress for the session.

I did not consider taking a session with you but this post triggered it.  I am so grateful I did it.

PS: (Warning!) One session with Mystress might change your life forever. ;)

Ernst

I forgot to mention that I am happy and relieved. My heart is dancing of joy. :D


Mystress

 Not many responded to this thread, but many responded to my paypal account which was the point. :) A few donations but mostly renewals which is wonderful.

  I was so resistant to talking about my finances in this space... ugh! I hate nagging people for money too, I prefer to forget debts and trust Goddess provides.

  Surrender takes so many forms... Goddess said 'tell them' so I did... and it was the right thing to do even if I didn't want to.

   So FST doesn't have thousands of students...? It has never been about quantity.  I am so honoured by the *quality* of people who are drawn to this work. You all are so great!

Blossom

Thanks for the reminder. I just renewed.

And Mari you're right, I did feel an internal shift after renewing. :)

Blossom


eboné

Thank you for doing this.

I appreciate you sharing.

I will renew shortly.

When my children leave for the summer in the next two weeks, I will definitely
sign up to work with you. I have wanted to for sometime but with my life restarting
my finances were shaky. It is getting better and I will.

Also, when can I graduate???? Is there something else I must do????

<3

Mystress

Quote from: eboné on Jun 26, 2016, 06:23:51 AM
Also, when can I graduate???? Is there something else I must do????

When I get a grad essay I usually set it aside and then read it over 3x, then set it aside again for a few days to percolate. Unfortunately I then sometimes forget about it. Gentle reminders are ok.

  I do get essays at times that I am not sure how to respond to. Recently I got one, student  admitted they had been unable to really get grounded or connect with their DB. Those two things are pretty much primary to the training so, basically writing a grad essay to tell me they failed?  Um...

Sometimes it helps to remind people that I am in the habit of not deactivating expired memberships, and they can start over if they wish.

  Lovely essay, you graduated!

eboné


Sava

I am so grateful for your work, it has been life saving for me in ways and I cannot wait for what's in store as I progress, however, just a suggestion, maybe there should be a widget on the "Renewing" page that says when your current membership expires? I plan to renew when my subscription is up but I'm not sure when that is, I suppose I could go through some old emails and maybe find an email informing me of when I renewed here in FST the second time so I can go for a third but I think it would be easier to have it there for everyone to see. It may even motivate people to renew.
One moment at a time ~

Mystress

Quote from: Sava on Jul 31, 2018, 12:26:04 AM
I am so grateful for your work, it has been life saving for me in ways and I cannot wait for what's in store as I progress, however, just a suggestion, maybe there should be a widget on the "Renewing" page that says when your current membership expires? I plan to renew when my subscription is up but I'm not sure when that is, I suppose I could go through some old emails and maybe find an email informing me of when I renewed here in FST the second time so I can go for a third but I think it would be easier to have it there for everyone to see. It may even motivate people to renew.

  I don't think that is possible. It took me a while to find a membership management system that had the option to not automatically remove expired memberships and also worked with paypal. When I checked that option during setup, a bunch of features related to it, disappeared, including keeping track of renewal payments. It doesn't.  It sends a reminder email 14 days before the membership expires for first year.

  When someone renews, I get the paypal notice and go "Yay!", send them appreciative thoughts and archive the email. That's all that happens, on my end. The blessings people report, come from Goddess. Renewing has no effect on the membership management system. If it did, it would probably set all the mystery curtains back to zero!

  I guess that sounds funny but the system found no reason to keep track of renewals of memberships that do not expire and I realized, I didn't either, beyond my email archives and the paypal record for the accounting. My archaic email software, Eudora filters my incoming emails into folders, by sender and recipient addresses plus the subject line. All the renewals go into the same folder and easy to check, I just seldom have a reason to. On the rare occasion (every few years) I do deactivate a membership, I always search my email archives for their payments to see if I owe them anything.

  Your suggestion is a good one, I had not thought of it like that before.  I guess I stepped so far back from nagging people for money that I kind of washed my hands of it all, and did not set up anything to remind people to renew beyond the automatic note, first year. Doh!

  You are right a webpage widget would be the least intrusive. People sometimes wander away from FST for years, and they pay a renewal when they return. Renewals are not always sequential and I would not want anything that tried to nag them for tuition for years when they were not even here. The easiest would be a widget that told you your registration date.

  Thanks for the suggestion! I may move these two posts to the tech board later ok?

Sava

Thanks for the response, so there is no reminder after the first year. I figure if checking when a membership was renewed is as easy as checking an email folder then maybe you could check and see when my current membership expires, so I can renew at that time? This way I can keep track of it on my own from now on, I have a feeling it may be coming up soon.
One moment at a time ~