Many thanks to those who sent or have promised donations. Altogether it comes to nearly 1k which is enough to make the visa payments and put my bank account back in the black. Yay!
I want to clear some things up:
I gave the impression I do not like asking for donations: that is true...I don't like asking, feels sort of humiliating...
but I love *getting* donations! Yeah!! Thank you very much!
Heinlein wrote "Money is the sincerest form of flattery" and there is a lot of truth in it! Fishing for compliments never felt right either, sorta lame and insecure. I have a general abundance policy of 'never refusing money freely offered' because Goddess moves in mysterious ways. It just doesn't feel as freely offered, if I ask... Funny eh?
Usually it works the other way around, I give my bills up to Goddess, with thanks that they are paid, and people start contacting me offering money... usually for sessions, but donations too, and sometimes other unexpected sources.
I guess some folks thought I had fallen into scarcity... no, actually I fell into grief because an old friend and patron of my arts died. Called me up to say goodbye before taking his leave, because he knew I would be really angry if he didn't... and I'll stop there coz there are still too many feelings for words. It is good though... in that growing is good even when painful. I know he is happy because he kept showing up to tell me so. My stuff is mine to sort, and release.
Even so, I want to share some of my thoughts on the topic, how I see my life. I feel like some students felt let down to see me out of sorts... "the medium is the message" and a good teacher is walking her talk.
Someone wrote: Wealth is a mindset. The poverty mindset, once broken, has a difficult time reestablishing itself. ; )
Allow me to clairfy: counting my blessings...
I live in a peaceful, slightly upscale suburb of the most beautiful city in the world. I have gained friends all over the globe by following my bliss. I get people travelling around the planet to see me, guests visiting as old friends meeting for the first time. I get to travel the world by invitation from people who love and respect me, who want me to succeed and treat me like a living saint. Although I tend to be a workaholic, my schedule is my own, aside from keeping agreements to people who paid me, (and they tend to be patient) I am free to spend my days and nights as I please. My office window looks into my deck and backyard, which is coastal rainforest with giant cedar and maple trees full of wildlife, blue jays and woodpeckers, owls, squirrels, tiny song sparrows, even a few crows and coons. Beautiful sunsets through the trees. One cedar tree grows right through a hole in the lower sundeck, making it ideally huggable but it takes 2 people to encircle it. I grow flowers and vegetables because it pleases me, not because I need the food. I love to play dress up, have the largest and best wardrobe of anyone I know, (even if 1/2 of it doesn't fit at present) and dress to please nobody but myself. Half of my 2600 sqft house is given over to my hobbies, arts and interests. The house itself, has increased in value from 230k to 370k in 5 years since we bought it, with no sign of slowing down. I own 1/2 but my husband pays all the major bills for it leaving me free to follow my bliss even if my doing so it doesn't pay much cash yet. I drive a beautiful old sportscar (1991 240sx) that is in great condition and fun. The chi of the mighty Fraser river can be felt from my sun deck, it is visible less than a mile away. The water from my kitchen tap is so pure it doesn't need a filter, and is treated with ultraviolent and ozone, not chlorine. My neighborhood is so safe that I often leave my doors unlocked, even sometimes when I am not home. I can immerse myself in a jacuzzi tub in my spa bathroom downstairs anytime, or sit by a real wood fireplace in the rec room. I have friends come to patio and dinner parties to feast them because I love to cook for people, and I know the joy I find in giving comes back multiplied. Within 1/2 hour's drive I can be at one of several beaches, including a world famous nude beach with a wonderful energy vortex that attracts a lot of hippies and spiritual types. I can be downtown, or on a mountaintop, or in a huge zen garden, or in a desert-like area of sand dunes. (Ever watch Stargate? It is filmed here... all those planets environments are within an hours drive.) For a vacation, I can go sailing in the most beautiful cruising area in the world, on my husband's yacht... he recently traded in the 36' catalina he has had for 20 years, for a 28' crown because I asked for the option to stay in this house indefinitely instead of selling it and moving up the coast when he retires. The crown, has a spinnaker... one of those big colourful balloon sails on the front, which I always wished for on the old boat. We anchor in pristine wilderness coves, and eat wild caught crabs, fish and oysters. I am married for 11 years to the gentlest man I have ever known, a man who saw Goddess in me and named Her when I was still trying to figure out what to call this Presence that said 'it was nameless infinite, and that it was me.' he is my cherished slave for life, and completely indulges me to the limits of his time, energy and financial capacity. he is fine with me having as many other slaves and lovers as I wish, and to do whatever I want. he forsaw me, decades before we met... and what struck him most about that vision, feeling of his pride in my creativity and he doesn't mind that my creative impulses take up space, or when it makes a mess. he gives me stability and reminds me to eat. his love for me is so beautiful that I rub my nose on his furry chest wanting to crawl right into his heart... and he tells me, I am already there. he is a gift of Goddess.
I have been world famous, for my beauty, sex appeal and my wisdom, and photos of me adorn altars and pleasure places all over the world. I have appeared on global television, and TV across canada on many occasions, doing and talking about the things I love. I have appeared on the big screen. There is a song about me on an album that won a grammy award. People I have never met, send me gifts out of appreciation for what I am and what I share. I have had thousands of men at my feet, worshipping me and telling me I am the most amazing and beautiful woman in the world. I have climbed the steps of Chichen itza with the voice of the rain God in my ears. I have had books dedicated to me, I have testimonials and adoration letters stacked up to my neck, if I printed them all. I have circled with the druids in stonehenge at summer solstice. I have walked on fire, I have made it thunder and rain with my pleasure and my joy. I have vanished in broad daylight among strangers and friends who have known me for years, I have attained spiritual goals I was told did not exist when I was a child.
I could go on and on, counting my blessings... :)
I am RICH! So stinking rich with experiences and an amazing lifestyle that it embarrasses me to ask for donations, even when I really am short of cash.
I am living the impossible dream of millions, if not billions of people and my biggest problem? Is people who want to spit nails at me out of sheer green envy because they cannot believe that they are also Gods of their own lives. Heh!
I was relatively young when I decided that my best investment, was in my self. I was a little older, investing in myself via a personal development course when I discovered I like to play so much more than work, I was unlikely to ever be successful working for a living, but I might do very well playing for a living because I can only stick with something if it fascinates me. I became a pro-dom.
Somewhere between those two realizations I did a Loiuse Hay video and following the instructions, refined my definition of play, as art. Refined what I wanted. All I really wanted to do since they asked in Grade 1, was to travel, and to do art to please my own Muse, and not have to worry the least bit about whether the art would sell.
My ideal life would be to have patrons, who supported me in comfort just because it felt good to them to do that, so I could just get on with doing my art and not be concerned with anything but that, and enjoying life so I have energy to do more art. It is said, nobody becomes an artist because they want to, but because, they MUST.
Patrons of the arts get gifts of art, often they promote the art and the artist. I am so prolific I give art away anyhow just for the joy of sharing and to have room to make more.
These recent events have helped me to realize I haven't changed a bit, since then. I got into doing my own sites because three attempts to get someone else to do it, even paying someone did not give me the result I wanted. As an art it lost interest when I could not keep up with the tech, which to me is WORK and no wonder having to do it myself has slowed down the flow.
This is my art, I am going to keep on cranking out the words and the magic, shaping consciousness regardless of whether I get paid or not. Being a Shaman in service to a community, it is imperative to keep doing the art anyway and it is also, usually really blissful and fun. Art of consciousness is something I have been doing on and off since high school... actually, high school that is when I started doing art with other people's consciousness. I started messing with my own, in my crib.
The problem is I got so busy with the art, I fell into work mindset instead of play, and forgot to ask Goddess for some more patrons... Thank you Goddess for the patronage of my students, for the patrons of my past, and the new patrons coming into my life. Bless them all.
Ah, that feels better.
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It would be cool if the people who like the art, can do the marketing and stuff... hang a frame on it and share it with the world as people who enjoy something, always like to do. Which does happen, via forwarded links and search engine stats anyway.
If they make a profit and share the profit with me then that is them being patrons... That would be my ideal.
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Money doesn't motivate me much, I am more interested in experiences.
Last week I realized that since I am ok with owning and having things just for the pleasure of owning, why not owning a bag of cash just to experience the enjoyment of having. I decided it was ok!
I have never had a bank balance more than $5000. and that was with a gift of my granny. I never had enough cash to get a lot of credit, so I mostly have used cash and never incurred large debts. I never went far off the middle path, either way, into big cash or big debt because money as an end in inself never interested me.
Then I got more insights, that the not having it before is partly because I really do see money as an expression of energy, and energy must flow. Stagnant chi becomes karma, stuck orgone becomes d'or, still waters turn swampy.
That, coupled with the tendency to self -invest in the pursuit of personal growth and experiences... simply not interested in money as an end in itself. Interested in what it can do... and that usually means, spending it. Love spending it, got no problem there!
This idea that money must flow, was actually validated recently; a talk on TV by the guy who wrote "rich dad poor dad" explaining that because of inflation and the growth based economy system, people who went into debt in the 70s actually ended up better off than those who saved their money, because the dollar went down so fast that the value of savings and debts both decreased. Those who saved saw the value of their savings dwindle, while those who were indebted saw the value of their debts become smaller, sometimes while the purchases they had made increased in value faster than interest rates. They became less indebted while the savers lost money, and so the debters actually came out ahead. It really turned my head around, blasting away more chunks of my parents 1930s depression era values; what represented security, to them.
Robert Kyosaki is good!
I am not particularly interested in money as a security blanket, rainy day fund sort of thing. Wealth does not grant immunity to most of the lumps and trials life has to offer.. you can see that fact on the news any night.
I am more interested in money for what it can do.
What it comes out to, is that my impulses are correct. Money sitting in a bank account, stagnates, especially with the pitiful interest the banks pay. Money, like love, increases when it is put into action, into motion. When it is invested one of the three boxes of life: work, education or leisure.
My investment strategy puts me even farther ahead, because investing in myself continues to pay dividends regardless of the economy.
I turned money into life energy, invested in my inner bank account, and my cup runneth over. The investments I made in myself can only increase in value, unless I lose them to Alzhiemers or something... but even so, I am an artist, so the art will live on in the hearts and minds of the people it touched, when the flesh that manifested it has long passed.
I think I am curious to have the experience of a large bank account, just for the sake of it... knowing that once the novelty has worn off, I will probably frame the bank book for my wall, like a postcard from a holiday, then turn around and invest the money back in myself and my art.
surprised nobody responded to this... did I piss you off or what?
Personally I found it to be one of those texts where you(I) couldn't add or comment on anything. (In a positive way, ofcourse)
Very inspiring, thank you for taking the time :)
/Samuel
Hello Mystress,
FYI I did not see this message until today, although it shows a post date of a week ago, and I've been on the board several times since then.
Your home sounds even more beautiful than the descriptions you've offered before, and i'm very happy you enjoy such surroundings. My life is so different from yours, except for the part about being full of incredible blessings. :)
I am also still grieving. Thanks for the reassurance that he is happy. I'm struggling with that part of it more than anything else.
Love,
Lady C
Quote from: Samuel on Nov 03, 2007, 12:29:25 PM
Personally I found it to be one of those texts where you(I) couldn't add or comment on anything. (In a positive way, ofcourse)
Very inspiring, thank you for taking the time :)
/Samuel
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I agree with Samuel. What you wrote was beautiful. There is never too much gratitude, in my opinion. :)
Blessings!
Eileen
Sitting. Grounded in Goddess. Smiling from the inside. You go, lady.
The first time, i saw Mystress' article in the Temple-section and was surprised next time to find it in Tech, here. Pondered if She had decided to repot it.
Like others who responded here, i just felt too overwhelmed and still i do.
Money is a matter of reality and often when confronted with reality, we get dejected from the separation between what is and what is cool. Where money unfortunately goes and where we like it to go. But surrendering separation, transcend it, is exactly our study business here, isn't it?
So, an old shabby housing can be the stirrup for a new one and become disposed of, once the new one is occupied. This lies in the nature of houses and perhaps the old house even has a hearty wish for it to happen this way.
And possibly the crappy capitalist money has a similar deep desire for its transmutation. So it seems worth a consideration to open for it.
A stinking rich Witch, who doesn't define herself by money, but has good use for it is something... let's say, which arouses my heart. Old ideas of humane communism fall into place and make my Marxist heart laugh.
After all, those both infamous guys had always been busy and open students and never been dogmatists(dogmatist was the privilege of their followers).
And one of them(Engels) was a full-blooded businessman.(And sort of a Matriarchist/Feminist).
The idea of an "International Goddess Shop" entered my mind. Has someone had similar musings?
Which would be embossed by Mystress' stamp, and earn Her a franchise...
In effect, any material success, that is a consequence of Her influence on more sane living-conceptions is worth such a franchise via 'honor system', i think.
Peace and progress,
juergen
Quote from: Sigmund on Nov 04, 2007, 05:58:46 PM
Sitting. Grounded in Goddess. Smiling from the inside. You go, lady.
Yeah, man!
Thanks to everyone who responded.
Juergen: I released it in the Temple, a prayer of surrender... then moved it to tech the next day. Tech has also become Mystressblog.
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There is nothing in FST promoting the values or virtues of poverty. Quite the opposite, with the money quotes. I believe in the truth of Maslow's hierarchy, the body's basic needs of food, shelter and safety need to be handled before moving onto higher spiritual pursiuts. Thus, scholarships are extremely rare. Ability to pay for the course, and willingness to invest in yourself are a sort of entrance exam. :) People who haven't got that sorted, usually are not ready for what I teach.
Letting go of attachment to the material is important, but personally I find I can enjoy material things even more, if I am not attached to them. I am a hedonist, to balance spending a lot of time out of my body and feeling nothing.
The Goddess is a Goddess of abundance. She does not make one apple, She makes hundreds, with no concern how most of them are returned to the earth. Not one sperm, but millions.
The big cedar tree growing through the tree hugging deck, drops millions of seeds onto the upper deck, which fill the spaces between the boards. They sprout in spring making the deck look hairy with green. Then the sprouts dry up and die in the summer heat. Kind of sad.
Last year, I swept a box of seeds up, and promised the tree I would make up for it by sending some of its seeds to friends around the world. Haven't done so yet, not sure it is legal to ship them. Anybody want some giant Western Red Cedar tree seeds? Rainforest giants, live for thousands of years... the one in back is just a baby, perhaps 50 years old. I think, few people would have the climate or the parking spot to raise a baby cedar. I cannot imagine them as indoor plants, feels wrong.
This summer, I am enjoying some R&R, relaxing on an air mattress on the deck. I look up through the canopy of branches, and start to laugh. All of the tree's seed cones are growing on one side of the tree... in fact, they are all positioned to drop onto the upper deck. Unusually thick clusters of them, like grapes.
That, was not the result I had in mind... maintaining a wooden deck in a rainforest when tons of iron-rich acidic cedar leaves and bits are falling on it year round is very much like hard work, I did not intend to encourage the tree to drop even more!
... but looking from the trees point of view, it holds no regrets for its thousands of dead children. That was my stuff. What it heard, was that I would help distribute the seeds, if it dropped them on the deck. Still makes me laugh... at myself... :)
Funny though, how I take my relationship with the tree, and the evidence of two way communication for granted. That sort of magic was just a dream, when I was a child.
Here is what I don't mention in FST level 1, lest ego get ahold of it and make a mess. Here is what the people who spit daggers of envy don't comprehend:
When you give yourself to Goddess, Goddess gives you back your dreams! Dreams long forgotten, manifest- because it was Goddess gave you the dreams, in the first place and you finally got out of your own way enough for them to flow into your life.
Ego gets ahold of that idea, it thinks to use Goddess to get what it wants, and that doesn't work. Ego wants to barter, karma for enlightenment, sacrifice for reward. Doesn't work. Just makes more attachments, takes you farther away into struggle.
I remember a 12 year old girl, struggling hard with being a social misfit... reading Jonathan Livingston Seagull, and getting the idea that maybe being a misfit was part of a higher calling... the joy knocked me into samadhi, I lost time... Her impossible dream, I am living it. Ascended, and teaching flight school. :) Teaching people, to grow wings and fly.
"Each of us is in truth an idea of the Great Gull, an unlimited
idea of freedom," Jonathan would say in the evenings on the
beach, "and precision flying is a step toward expressing our
real nature. Everything that limits us we have to put aside.
http://www.oddvenue.com/cgi-bin/bookviewer1.pl?bookname=jonathon_livingston_seagull (http://www.oddvenue.com/cgi-bin/bookviewer1.pl?bookname=jonathon_livingston_seagull)