Some many many months ago - I contacted Mystress in order to have a personal session - long distance over the phone. There was something in my past I had forced forgotten - I felt a need to turn up the contrast on the memorie(s) because I was of the opinion the energy being diverted in keeping it hidden could be directed more toward my growth. After the session I was asked if I wanted to share my experience by writing about it...
The intention has remained to post about it, even though the action has been long in coming. Perhaps over time the experience has gained further reflections that carry more of what I was learning about...
I had practised self-hypnosis for years and other techniques relating to the unconcious / subconcious mind. The deep oceans of awareness have always pulled me. And bringing up these forgotten memories that lay as deep shadows was proving an impossible task... And the more I began to think about them the more attention and energy I gave to them...
With Mystress's help and attention, the force of these memories shifted. I became aware of a shard-like energy. These were my memories - they seemed alien to me and yet so closely personal. To have them run as a movie involved associating into them and feeling the emotions that were present at the time... My awareness was also witnessing the memories - detached and yet intimate, where I was able to associate with a guardian-like energy that was watching me perform the actions those many linear years ago...
Mystress asked me to call my 'Guardian Angel' and make it clear to 'the little child that I was in the memory' that the actions I had taken were appropriate to the time etc... This brought to my attention an even deeper sense that when I was the child performing those actions originally I had the sense that my Guardian Angel was there whispering in my ear... telling me what was taking place was in fact part of a lesson that extended through time to another part of me... There would come a time in my linear future that would reveal this lesson to me so that I would integrate these understandings...
There have been many similar experiences since the session where I have remembered other parts of my childhood... with these memories came deep personal lessons... It is remarkable how relative time is!
Thank you for listening :)
Rustle