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   "The Christian resolution to find the world ugly and bad has made the world ugly and bad."

Friedrich Nietzsche

   The feminist agenda is not about equal rights for women. It is a socialist, anti-family political movement that encourages women to leave their husbands, kill their children, practice witchcraft, destroy capitalism and become lesbians.

Pat Robertson, 1992

   First of all, I was brought up always to think of God as a woman. However, God is the total mind which generates, organizes and delivers. God stands for generation, organization and delivery. Therefore, it is more representative of the female energy in the universe. In many cultures, it is recognized as goddess energy. Goddess energy and intelligence is wholistic, wise, nourishing, intuitive, contextual, relational, does not have a win/lose orientation and does not believe in linear cause and effect. Male energy and intelligence is linear, has win/lose orientation and rules through conquest and subjugation. Both were necessary in a certain time of our evolutionary history. The male intelligence protected us from predators and gave rise to the flight/fright response. We learned either to run or to fight. That same response has made us the most dangerous predator on Planet Earth, and unless we quickly embrace the eternal feminine in us as a society and a civilization, we risk our own extinction and will continue to give birth to a legacy of hatred, war, terrorism, predation, conquest, subjugation and ecological devastation. The Goddess must return.

When God Was a Woman.

Author Unknown.

(Softly, fade in)
Warm caress in the night time
Tender lip of the rose at dawn
Echoing crypt in the shadows
Can you tell me where She's gone?

(Chorus I)
Do you remember when God was a woman?
She had many, many names.
Do you remember when God was a woman?
She had many, many names.

We call Her Isis, Astarte, Diana, Hecate, Demeter, Kali, and Inanna.
We call Her Isis, Astarte, Diana, Hecate, Demeter, Kali, and Inanna.

She was the Mother the Earth and all Her children
From the sky, the land and the sea.
She was the green one growing,
Ripening, sustaining, giving life abundantly
She was the sunlight, starlight,
Waxing moon and waning
And the Queen of Heaven too.
She was the deep space and the galaxies
Of planets that we ride twirling through

Do you remember when God was a woman?
She had many, many names.
Do you remember when God was a woman?
She had many, many names.
We call Her Isis, Astarte, Diana, Hecate, Demeter, Kali, and Inanna.
We call Her Isis, Astarte, Diana, Hecate, Demeter, Kali, and Inanna.

     We heard Her voice in the force of the whirlwind
     We felt Her pulse in the tide and the driving rain
     We saw Her blood at the birth of our children
     We taste Her flesh in the growing rain

Do you remember when God was a woman?
She had many, many names.

She was the young one, the holy maiden huntress,
New life that blooms in the spring
She was the seed, the key, the power of the beginning
The door that's opening.
She was the old one, the hag, the crone of wisdom
The deep grave under the earth.
She was the Queen of night, the face of death
And the darkness, the cauldron of rebirth

We call Her Isis, Astarte, Diana, Hecate, Demeter, Kali, and Inanna.
We call Her Isis, Astarte, Diana, Hecate, Demeter, Kali, and Inanna.

     We heard Her voice in the force of the whirlwind
     We felt Her pulse in the tide and the driving rain
     We saw Her blood at the birth of our children
     We taste Her flesh in the growing rain

Do you remember when God was a woman?
She had many, many names.

She was the warm caress in the night time
She was the tender lip of the rose at dawn
She was the echoing crypt in the shadows
Can you tell me wHere She's gone?
Is She forgotten?

Can we find Her resting place?
When is the hour of Her return?
We go without Her and the pain is all around.
The forest dies...the witches burn
We called you

   (and we) remember...
   (and we) remember...
   (and we) remember...
And we remember dreams will take us in our hearts
To the place where She had gone.
She's still among us!
We sing Her name, She answers and
She still lives on and on (and on)
She still lives on and on

Do you remember when God was a woman?
She had many, many names.
Do you remember when God was a woman?
She had many, many names.

She is the lover, sweet passion and desire
Embracing men and woman too
She is the skin, the hands, the mouth the swelling chest
And She's the gate of love we all pass thru
And She's the world outside us and the world inside.
She is the birth, life, live and death
Well She's both near and far, the
boundary and the center
She is north, south, east and west.

We call Her Isis, Astarte, Diana, Hecate, Demeter, Kali, and Inanna.
We call Her Isis, Astarte, Diana, Hecate, Demeter, Kali, and Inanna.

She is the woman who is crying for justice
And She lives in the hurt and the angry ones.
And She moves in the power of changing
And She calls to our hearts freedom! Freedom!

Do you remember when God was a woman?
She had many, many names.
Do you remember when God was a woman?
She had many, many names.
We call Her Isis, Astarte, Diana, Hecate, Demeter, Kali, and Inanna.
We call Her Isis, Astarte, Diana, Hecate, Demeter, Kali, and Inanna!

    More than any other time in history, mankind faces a cross-roads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness. The other, to total extinction. Let us pray we have the wisdom to choose correctly.

Woody Allen, Side Effects

    What are the marks of a sick culture?

    It is a bad sign when the people of a country stop identifying themselves with the country and start identifying with a group. A racial group. Or a religion. Or a language. Anything, as long as it isn't the whole population.

    A very bad sign. Particularism. It was once considered a Spanish vice but any country can fall sick with it. Dominance of males over females seems to be one of the symptoms.

    Before a revolution can take place, the population must loose faith in both the police and the courts.

    High taxation is important and so is inflation of the currency and the ratio of the productive to those on the public payroll. But that's old hat; everybody knows that a country is on the skids when its income and outgo get out of balance and stay that way - even though there are always endless attempts to wish it way by legislation. But I started looking for little signs and what some call silly-season symptoms.

    I want to mention one of the obvious symptoms: Violence. Muggings. Sniping. Arson. Bombing. Terrorism of any sort. Riots of course - but I suspect that little incidents of violence, pecking way at people day after day, damage a culture even more than riots that flare up and then die down. Oh, conscription and slavery and arbitrary compulsion of all sorts and imprisonment without bail and without speedy trial - but those things are obvious; all the histories list them.

    I think you have missed the most alarming symptom of all. This one I shall tell you. But go back and search for it. Examine it. Sick cultures show a complex of symptoms as you have named... But a dying culture invariably exhibits personal rudeness. Bad manners. Lack of consideration for others in minor matters. A loss of politeness, of gentle manners, is more significant than a riot.

    This symptom is especially serious in that an individual displaying it never thinks of it as a sign of ill health but as proof of his/her strength. Look for it. Study it. It is too late to save this culture - this worldwide culture, not just the freak show here in California. Therefore we must now prepare the monasteries for the coming Dark Age. Electronic records are too fragile; we must again have books, of stable inks and resistant paper. Source:

Friday and Dr. Baldwin in "Friday" By Robert Heinlein.

    I suspect that our race's tragedy has been played endless times. It may be that an intelligent race has to expand right up to its disaster point to achieve what is needed to break out of its planet and reach for the stars. It may always -- or almost always -- be a photo finish, with the outcome uncertain to the last moment. Just as it is with us. It may take endless wars and unbearable population pressure to force-feed a technology to the point where it can cope with space. In the universe, space travel may be the birth pangs of an otherwise dying race. A test. Some races pass, some fail...

Jacob Solomon in "Time Enough for Love" By Robert Heinlein.


Matriarchy and History.

  Western culture is patriarchal.  I was raised in a Christian home, where the Divine was always referred to in masculine terms.  The Lord God the Father.  If you grew up in a Patriarchal culture, then you probably associate the Divine with masculine identity, even if you are an atheist.

   Patriarchal religions always have God off in the sky somewhere distant:  external, vengeful and righteous.  As human beings in male dominated Western culture, we have been immersed in Patriarchal ideals that are so habitual they are rarely questioned or considered; we take them for granted without seeing them.

   Matriarchy focuses on the infinite spark of the Divine within in everything, including inside of you.  Goddess is All that Is, including me!  Wheee!  Joy.

Patriarchy = external God.
Matriarchy = Goddess is within you, within everything.

Sometimes people take issue with my calling God, by a feminine pronoun:
Goddess. They insist that God is genderless, infinite spirit.

   They are right, and they miss the point:  The term "Goddess" is functional in how it changes one's thinking and identifications.

The purpose is to make a shift of thinking; to break away from thinking of God in the way Michelangelo painted: as an old white bearded guy in the sky...or as described in the old testament, a judgmental Father God with a tendency to smite people with lightning from his home in the heavens, and reward the faithful with crucifixion.

   A conscious choice to refer to the Divine as feminine, brings the masculine cultural associations from the unconscious into awareness, so that they can be acknowledged and surrendered. Choosing to think of the genderless Divine as female, draws your attention to the unconscious male gender ideas you carry, so you can let them go.

   The imperative of Kundalini is surrender, and it is difficult to surrender, if you do not trust.  Resistance makes the process more difficult.  The way to a smooth Kundalini process is to trust that the Divine spark within you, your Infinite Mind knows what it is doing and intends your highest good, so you can get out of the way and let the process unfold peacefully.

Many people have issues with the religion of their birth, and mistrust the punishing Father God of patriarchal culture.  It can be difficult to reconcile the cultural God archetype, with the idea of the Divine, manifest as the true nature of us mortal, fragile, fallible human beings, but this is the experience which unfolds through the Kundalini process.

Changing your gender identification of the Divine to an unconditionally loving Mother, can be useful for releasing the intimidating concepts of the righteous angry Father God on his lofty throne.  "Goddess" is a new idea that does not have the negative associations.

In order to release the cultural programming first you have to find it.  The beliefs that tend to be hardest to find, are the ones that are so habitual, so common as cultural beliefs that they are never questioned.

As a teenager, I was impressed by a quote from David Bowie in a Playboy magazine interview I was too young to be legally reading.  He said that he believed it was good to take himself to extremes, to add deeper cuts to his personality. He is an artist who keeps re-inventing himself, by moving headlong into experiences that ordinary people would shy away from.  He deliberately goes places that are new, difficult, sometimes uncomfortable in order to push himself to be more open and creative.

It is a Zen idea, that if one gets off balance in one direction, it is useful to find balance by going to the opposite direction.  I advocate the "middle path" of moderation, but I also believe that sometimes you cannot know where the middle is, until you have measured the distance to the edges.  Until you have pushed your own limits and expanded them. The place of detachment is found by collapsing opposites, bringing polarities together.

So, the Yogis go to the cremation grounds to meditate on life. Awareness of life is sharper in the presence of death.  The presence of the polarity brings it into sharper focus. By going to the extreme they can grow to see the underlying unity of life and death; that they are two sides of a coin, a turning wheel.  Death is illusion, yet its presence and inevitability is what makes life precious and beautiful.

The idea of the middle path comes from Buddhism.  The young Prince Siddharta was raised in a luxurious palace. His father had decreed that the Prince should have no knowledge of the dark side of human experience.  Siddharta knew nothing of illness, death or poverty. The first time he left the palace and saw the impoverished, the sick, the dead and the aged,  he abandoned his royal lifestyle to follow a spiritual path. He joined a group of ascetics, who starved and beat themselves, practiced abstinence and lived in the forest without shelter in the hope that by denying the body they would be rewarded in spirit.
  One day a pretty cowherd came by and gave Siddharta food, a bath and intimacy. The other ascetics where shocked and rejected him, but he was pleased with what he had done, how much better he felt indulging the body's needs instead of denying them and from this he was inspired with the idea of the Middle path. From royal luxury to hermit poverty, the Buddha explored the edges and found the middle road.

Matriarchy is about a change in consciousness... a different way of looking at the world, at Spirit, at ourselves and our relationship with others.  It's about moving into the opposite polarity, from the Patriarchy of Western culture, to find the edges of both paradigms, so you know where the middle path is.

The spiritual imperative is "Know Thyself."  Spiritual growth is about the process of self discovery. Learning where the edges are, is about getting to know your Self.

   Moving from one gender polarization to the other, eventually leads to the middle path... the genderless, formless, Self, that is Realized through the spiritual evolutionary process.

Spirit, what some call God or Buddha nature, Source, is infinite, genderless, ineffable, nameless. It, the Self, the  I AM, does not care what we call It; for no names can hold It or define It. We are the ones, who care... and what a lot of names we have come up with! What a lot of Holy Wars have been started, over this simple thing: what to call, that which is nameless.

The energy Itself doesn't care what we call It... Unconditional love does not judge. It is infinite, and nameless, words cannot encompass or describe it. The infinite energy of All that Is, is infinite, nameless, genderless. It is bigger than the limitations and definitions of gender. When one reaches beyond all dualities, including the polarity of gender, there is only Being.  It just Is. The Self is bigger than any limiting ideas of religion or dogma, including mine. yet, It is me, the infinite part of me. It is you. The part of you that is Infinite, unconditional love.

We are the ones who care about what we call our Gods. We are the ones who have the power to change our selves, by changing our beliefs, which in turn change our decisions, and thus, our lives. Moving into a Matrifocal belief, brings the Patriarchal, male dominant programming of culture, into sharp relief, so we can see it with awareness. So we can have the option to make better choices.

At that metaphysical level of existence, beyond duality, beyond the polarities of male-fem, light-dark, everything is True, and nothing is real. Religion and philosophy don't matter, in that place, they are limited human conceptions that cannot hold the Infinite. Since time and space don't exist at that level, that place is nowhere. It is now here. It is within our consciousness, as much as it is everywhere else.

In order to expand consciousness and come into awareness of that higher reality underlying creation, you have to discard the beliefs about yourself that say you, and everything else, are less that that. Let go of believing that the Divine is something off in the sky, outside of you.

Often when seekers are resistant to the concept of surrender, it is because they are afraid of giving power away to something they perceive as being outside of themselves.  Many people have a deep unconscious mistrust of the external, Patriarchal God. They have too much anger to be able to surrender fully. With the Goddess, you can make a fresh start.

Traditionally, in Hindu texts, the Kundalini Shakti is referred to as a Goddess; In most Kundalini oriented writings, you will find this convention. Kundalini is the Goddess. Goddess Shakti. Goddess is within you, the smarter part of your own mind, which guides and directs the Kundalini process.

     For decades male archaeologists and scholars insisted that Matriarchal, female dominant cultures were a myth, that the status quo of the Patriarchy was how things have always been.

It was not until women became archaeologists that the symbols of the Goddess were recognised. It was when we had a sufficient number of feminine voices speaking of their conclusions and discoveries to be heard as a dissenting voice, that the evidence of the Matrifocal history of early human culture started coming to light.  Great female archaeologists and scholars like Marija Gimbutas saw the signs of the Goddess  birds, spirals and chevrons- through feminine eyes and brought about a radical change in how we understand prehistoric mythology, religion and culture.

  From an historical, evolutionary viewpoint, Matriarchy long predates Patriarchy.  The earliest roots of religion were Matriarchal. The oldest idols are feminine, the most ancient tombs are shaped like a uterus and vulva; womb shaped.  Birth and death, a cycle.  Birth, and the mysteries of menstruation are the oldest miracles, blood and birth and death belonged to the Mother Goddess. At death, people went back to the Mother, to be reborn.

Mother is still our "first God". She is the power we first learn to surrender to, as the source of life, food, comfort... survival. The rhythm of her heartbeat was the first tune we danced to, floating in the amniotic sea of her womb.

The earliest Goddesses were associated with Serpents. Serpents were considered a symbol of the Earth itself. Shedding skin was considered a sign of rebirth. The Oroborus, a serpent with it's tail in it's mouth, is a symbol of the Infinite, and the circle of life. Life eats life, with out beginning and with out end.

In nature, creation springs from the feminine... as the Wiccan chant goes,

"We all come from the Goddess,
and to Her we shall return,
like a drop of rain,
flowing to the ocean."

   Returning to the Goddess, and merging with that Infinite Self is the final result of the Kundalini process. Surrender is letting go of the small self, and turning your life path over to the love and wisdom of the part of you that is Infinite.

In Wiccan theology, the Goddess is considered primary. She is eternal, immortal, endlessly creative, always giving birth. The God is Mortal, the Stag King Her consort, dying with the cut grain, with the fading seasons to be reborn again and again through the Goddess.

Matrifocal religions tend to be permissive, using the power of sacred sexual energy for magical purposes: making the crops grow better by sharing sexual energy on a full moon in the fields.  Modern scientific studies have proven the effectiveness of these ancient rituals!

   Matrifocal spiritual paths tend to focus on cherishing of the body as a sacred vessel, on life itself, as a gift of Goddess.  Matriarchy says: 'Let us follow the instincts She gave us, in Her wisdom, and worship Her with acts of Love and Pleasure.' This is a much more humanist attitude than "God is up there in heaven disapproving of the physical mud people having sex":  The programming of puritan Christian western culture.

Asceticism and deprivation is the difficult road to enlightenment...denial of the body wisdom is the Patriarchal way. Your body knows that the quickest path to Goddess is through pleasure and bliss.  Goddess comes through with that message, even if She has to eroticise patriarchal sexual guilt and pain/punishment itself, to turn you on to Life.

Goddess designed your body to have the path of enlightenment built right into your DNA, as instinctive as learning to walk.  For patriarchal religion to complete it's power grabs over the much stronger matriarchal religions, all trappings of the sacred power of sex had to be strictly suppressed. Women had to be programmed to believe that their sexual appetites, free will, and even their sacred moon blood was unclean and sinful, a sign of weakness instead of a sign of Her power and fertility.

It is the winners of wars who write the history books. and there were wars in the transition from the early Matrifocal religions, to the Patriarchal:

  The Priestesses of Goddess Bridgit of Ireland used the Serpent as their sacred symbol, even though there are not, and have never been snakes in Ireland. It was these women, midwives and healers who were the "snakes" St. Patrick drove into the sea. The Pope forbade healing because illness and pain of childbirth was believed to be God's punishment for sin. The Priestesses drowned themselves in the sea rather than be converted, and forbidden to use their healing power.

The "Song of Solomon", or "Song of Songs" in the Old Testament was originally a Sumerian invocation of Inanna, the Goddess of love.  She who was worshipped in the sacred groves on the hill tops.  Solomon worshipped in those groves. His son David cut them down, killed the worshippers, and cut the Goddess out of the Hebrew faith.

In the Song of Solomon, Inanna's lover, the God has been taken by death, and she wanders lonely seeking him to resurrect him, just as Isis wandered seeking Osiris, after he had been torn to pieces and killed. It follows the theme of the God dying, and being reborn through the Goddess.

In 1500BC, the Aryan Horsemen from the North, invaded the Indus Valley, where the peaceful, Matriarchal culture of the Dravidians had resided for 1500 years. The Dravidian culture originated what we now know as sexual Tantra.  The winners write the history books, and the Aryans did their best to smash the culture they had conquered, replacing the Goddess Mother with Patriarchal Gods of War.  However, as with the Christian missionaries, the result was a merging, not a replacement, of the original culture.

The early Christians referred to the Holy Spirit as "God the Mother."  What happened to that idea?  Around 500 AD, Rome was at war. Constantinople, a Roman general claimed to have seen a crucifix in a vision that promised him victory. At that time, Christians used the symbol of the fish.  He won, became Emperor of Rome and spent the rest of his life rearranging Christianity to be a political tool of oppression, and burning anyone who did not agree, as a heretic.  He did not convert to Christianity himself, until he was old and at death's door. His sons continued the work of editing the New Testament into the perfect tool of political subjugation.

For patriarchal religion to maintain it's mind control idea of a forbidding punishing God, it was vital that the best sources of true awakening and spiritual ecstasy be suppressed... because folks who are awakened have direct irrefutable evidence of Goddess within, and cannot be controlled or convinced otherwise.  They will not listen to anyone telling them God needs a middleman, a Priest. People who are awakened tend not to listen to outside authority telling them things that disagree with their own spirit.

I don't expect you to, either.  I am not a Guru, for you to have unconditional trust and faith in. that would be patriarchal, trying to find God-dess outside of yourself, in me.  I won't take the Guru role, to be God for you. You are the God of your own life.

   I experimented with the Guru role for a few years, and I took it to some interesting extremes, in a consensual way. I had devotees who went from zero to self realized in six months, they could not sustain it. I had taken on their karma and transmuted it for them, so they did not really know themselves.  They recreated, or fell back into their karmic tendencies because they had not built a strong spiritual foundation of self knowledge. They did not know how they got there, because they were carried instead of walking the road with their own feet, so they did not know how to find the way back when they went astray.

   Some seekers find this course after becoming disaffected with a Guru, there is an instinct within them that cannot wholly trust what is outside of themselves. Their instinct is correct. Even with a successful Guru-devotee relationship there is a hierarchy that lingers even after the Devotee is self-realized. For example, Yogananda's achievements with the Self Realization Fellowship far outstripped the accomplishments of his Guru, Sri Yukteshwar.  Yet, in "Autobiography of a Yogi" there is a scene where Yogananda's dead Guru appears and Yogananda falls to his knees.  Why were they not yet equals?  Respect for the teacher I can understand, but his reaction is extreme.

    Enlightenment, is a do it yourself process.
    I am a Priestess, Mystress. teacher, trainer.  I see Goddess in me and in you, and my work is to train you to hear and surrender to the will of Goddess within yourself, and have none before.  To teach you how to set your ego self aside and turn your life over to the will of your own soul, and not another.  I will teach you discernment, how to hear the signals of your own body instincts, Goddess within you, telling you what is true for you.

   Look upon some of these ideas as "thought experiments"... try them out for yourself, see how they fit. Change your beliefs for a day, or a week, and see what comes up for you: how that affects how you make decisions in your life. Change your world, by changing inside of yourself... by changing your mind. You can always change your mind again, later if it does not work for you. In the meantime you will have gained insights into the inner workings of your own mind: the spiritual imperative "Know Thyself."

Find out, what is true, for you.

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Transcript of the Video Lesson.

    This tantra that I am teaching is on Matriarchy, a Matrifocal system, and I want to take a moment and explain what that means. Right now, we're in Western culture which is a Patriarchal system. We have a Father God, "the Lord", which by some scholars is considered to be genderless, but is generally thought of as a male Deity... and under the auspices of this male Deity, we are told to go forth and multiply, and conquer because we have dominion of nature. Well, that whole attitude has resulted in a huge environmental disaster on the level of a planetary crisis.

    The Patriarchal culture tends to deal with a very judgmental Father God figure, you know, who's going to smite you and throw you into hell if you don't do as you are told... and even though I was raised Roman Catholic, that idea was never resonant with me, with my own experience of Divinity, which was a maternal unconditional love which said that I was its child.

    So, this that we're working in now, is considered a Matrifocal system. Instead of a judgmental Father God, we have an unconditionally loving Mother Goddess.

    When I refer to Goddess, I'm referring to several things. First of all, I'm referring to the Infinite, of All That Is. Goddess is All That Is, It's what we're all made out of, you know, me, and the chair, and the carpet, and the camera. It's all Goddess.

    More specifically, I'm referring to our planet, Mother Gaia, She who gives birth to us all and nurtures us. I'm also referring to the Kundalini Shakti itself. In the Eastern context, the earth energy that rises up the spine is referred to as Kundalini Shakti. And then tHere is the male idea of Shiva, which is the destroyer aspect to Shakti's creator aspect. They're both important.

    We also have this idea presented in a slightly different duality where we can have a Goddess like Kali, who on one polarity is an unconditionally loving Mother, but on the other polarity is dark Kali with Her necklace of skulls, who rips out Shiva's guts and eats them, so that He can be reborn. So these are the Goddesses that we're dealing with.

    I also use the term "Goddess" because, quite frankly, this Divine energy is manifested in this very feminine body... and saying "Goddess" and writing those extra few letters, instead of "God", really helps me to stay grounded, in reminding me that it's me too. That Goddess is not something that is outside of you. It is also something that is inside of you, immanent, not something distant out up in in the stars, faraway watching down, but something that is immediate and active, participating in the co-creation of your own life.



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